DaveTheAnalyzer

Month two of the quarantine has passed. Technically, it probably should have been month three but we have a selfish, malicious, and incompetent egoist as a president. Still doing alright, able to have any live meetings I need to have online. I technically finished the first draft of my master project last Thursday. It was easier because a lot of the material for the last two chapters was already present in a pilot short story I wrote for one class. There was a lot of copy and pasting, though I did modify and change radically some sections. Now with the weeks left until submission, I’m reading and editing four pages a day starting from the very beginning. Of course, in my normal two hours a day routine, I could edit maybe a page or two more but I want to take my time and really make some improvements. Sometimes that means cutting and outright rewriting some sections. I know I won’t really be editing things down until the semester ends but I thought I might as well start on some more basic critiques.

But I might have at least a week long break before I really get down to editing my master project, so that could give me some time to edit and maybe even post the next chapters of We Will Hold On Forever, though don’t hold me to it. As I probably said before, I need to do some edits to clarify some confusion about the stakes of the conflict. I hope the people who read it will think the wait was worth it, especially since some events will happen that will whet the appetite for the next chapters (and it’ll probably be a long wait to the next chapters). From now on, I hope to have at least Saturday as a time to write and edit this story.

This will have to be balanced with other fic writing, because my mind is grabbed by a big Digimon crossover story. Seeing the Super Robot Wars crossover concept of having all the series happen in the same world at the same time and intercede with one another led to the plot bunny of doing the same with the Digimon series anime. I’m going with 02-Tamers-Frontier-Savers-Hunters-Appmon. Six plots, seven to eight casts. This is an undertaking probably too ambitious for me. I don’t know if it’ll actually go anywhere but I heard an interview with Get Out director Jordan Peele where his writing advice was to “follow the fun” and so I’m doing that, plotting one chapter a day and then writing bits of the crossover segments immediately after. All the possible friendship combos and how they can change a character and plot’s development are too tantalizing to resist. That will be the hard balancing act, how much to allow canon events to happen and how much to throw it out the window because of character interactions and the plotlines just being put into a blender. If this ever sees the light of day, that would be a pleasant surprise. Anyone with more commitment and such are free to steal this idea for this or any other fandoms.

That’s all for now. Pretty surprising to post this in the morning, though that’s more because my sleep schedule is out of whack again. Until the end of May, see you!

I’ve started therapy. I’ve been going for over a month now, talking about concerns and basic 101 matters on how to change. Hopefully this guidance would push me to be less reclusive and be braver. I have read through the documents the therapist provided twice last weekend, though I haven’t memorized them. I confronted someone in my house about using the r-slur several days prior and though I didn’t follow the instructions on the confronting paper exactly, the person did apologize. Granted, they didn’t seem the type to make a fight about it but that was heartening. I also poked a user if they were reposting fanart with permission or not but since I got no response, decided not to make a fight over it. The challenge is when to confront someone and when to walk away, as you often can’t change people’s minds. My therapist and I are currently going over my routines and looking to find times that can be opened up to make space for more socializing. Seeing any results will probably take months, even years, so I don’t expect immediate changes within me (Though I hope they will come to be positive)

In other news, yeah, it’s looking like I won’t be posting much of We Will Hold On Forever this semester, if not for the year. I keep skipping writing days for my master project and though I don’t technically have to make up for them, I feel the impulse to. So the fanfic will be put off for the most part. I’m vaguely thinking of doubling one day of master project writing so I would have a day to spare for the fanfic but I hesitate since that could be very draining. This is all happening when, for personal reasons, I’m losing some passion for writing Land Before Time fanfic. That sucks, because I like the series and I want to put my story ideas down but some negative associations have been polluting that love. I have decided to distance myself from those associations but I wonder if that is enough. At the very least, I want to finish We Will Hold On Forever if I’m really going to move on from the fandom.

( Cut for talk and spoilers for Birds of Prey and The Photograph, and some potential brief issues of transphobia and consent? )

That’s all for now. I’ve spent most of the Saturday rewriting this post and I have slept around the clock again to get to a good sleep schedule. I hope it works this time. Until the end of March, see you!

The end of another year and this time the end of a decade. Though that sometimes confuses me, since some don’t count a new set of numbers have started until it has turned into one, like 11, 2021, etc. Anyway, I believe I have changed a lot this past decade and made mistakes that I hope not to repeat again. I apologized for more than a few major and minor ones, though there are one or two I might have been better off letting time heal any annoyances or wounds. Unless someone approaches for the above or other errors I did in the past, maybe I should not just suddenly bring it up, as that can be intrusive unwelcome reminders of those times.

Anyway, I finished classes a week or two ago. Checking the grades, I got more A’s. I will be enjoying my vacation but it won’t be for long, as I will back doing the final classes of Master Project on the 15^th next month. I already talked to the professor about how I would go about the pace of writing original novel material but he said he would get back to that later. I can wait. Unfortunately, I mightn’t be able to update We Will Hold On Forever this month either. Editing down scenes is slow work and I sometimes distract myself by looking at my phone even though I put my laptop in airplane mode. I don’t know if I’ll be able to post before my spring classes start but I hope I can at least write on weekends and post the next chapters before I really dive into writing original work.

( Cut for spoilers for Queenn & Slim and Star Wars 9, and some talk of racism in the former )

That’s all for this year. I’ve been up all night, so after I edit and post this, I’m going to bed. Happy New Year, and see you at the end of January.

I went to that writer group like I said I would. There were three other people beside me and we went over Horror and its do’s and don’ts. There was an issue about covering a certain subject I disputed but the meeting in general was fine and I plan to clarify the issue at the next meeting. I often raised my hand to speak up on my views and writing advice. It was a bit of a challenge not to talk too much, an issue I have with a lot of in-person meetings. I want to say all my observations and ideas. I read a bit of my small chapter of We Will Hold On Forever, since I was already doing original fiction for classes (Yes, I know another perspective is valuable but I wasn’t interested in that at the moment). I explained a bit of The Land Before Time context before going in. It is writing that is two years old and I have developed a bit since then, so I was unsure about it, but though there were a few quibbles, the reception was good. One woman said the dialogue was realistic, which was wild to me, since I was merely imitating the talking style of these cartoon antagonists as best as I could. That was flattering to hear. I’ll continue going, to see if it will help in being social and being in contact with more people.

In other news, I found using a private window to prevent distraction while writing fanfiction wasn’t working. I mainly keep it open so as to listen to calming music but since that leaves me vulnerable to browse around to avoid writing, I decided to download the videos with calming music, close out the browser, and put the computer in airplane mode. I did begin to look around on my phone while I wrote the first day but that has barely popped up since. I’m making a page or two more progress than I did before. Not as much as I’d like but its progress. I don’t know if I will make posting the next chapters of We Will Hold On Forever before the end of December but we will shall see.

In education news, it’s soon time for me to write and post yet another short essay. This is about memoirs and about how accurate to be to reality. It’s a bit of a shorter timeframe than I remember with the first essay but I believe I can make it. I believe in being true, but memory is unreliable and subjective views can be useful for historical and group perspectives. Tracking down objective truth can be a challenge, since societal norms can make certain things “objective truth,” only later to be proven wrong. Ah well, I’ll see how that goes when I do the essay. I also have another book with a ton of pages to read. Don’t quote me on it, but I might skip some tumblr sessions in the days to come to make room for reading them.

( Cut for spoilers of Abominable and some of the awful politics I learned about it later )

That’s all for now. I’m taking the day off from some of my usual habits because it’s Halloween, though because of weather and other matters, trick or treating won’t happen until a day or two later. Until the end of November, see you!

Past mistakes can be hard to shake from the mind, whatever their level. There are some that are long ago and even minor, so would probably seem weird to bring up now. However, there is one issue at the moment I feel an urge to bring up. Around 2012, I posted an article about “Japan’s Untouchable Workers” on ontd_political One of the comments corrected that the term used in the article was somewhere in the slur direction and the proper term is the dowa people. I apologize that I didn’t respond and note that. I can barely remember my mindset when reading it but I barely responded to comments then and I might have saw it as a reaction against some of the political articles I have been posting. If the latter is true, I’m sorry about that. I shouldn’t have let my feelings get in the way of accepting such a correction. If someone corrects me on this matter now, I’ll acknowledge and note the correction. I’m ashamed of some of my actions in that community and I hope those I interacted with there that I annoyed and hurt to whatever level are in a better place since then.

In other news, my writing is still going at a snail’s pace. I have tried the method of opening a private window and play music there while I’m writing, only opening a regular window to watch a minute of Doctor Who for writing inspiration. But I still manage to get distracted. Mind you, it might be because this set of chapters involve a lot of fight scenes. There are some breaks of conversation and character that energize me but fight scenes can be draining. I’ll have to work on imbuing it with more character the next time around. Hopefully I can balance this writing with my classes starting at the beginning of the week. That does means any secondary writing beside We Will Hold On Forever will be more sporadic.

( Review and spoilers for The Farewell and Blinded by the Light )

That’s all for now. With classes starting, I’m thinking of pulling back from Tumblr posting after this Sunday, so I would have more time for class and other leisure stuff, since it takes up a lot of time. I’ll see how it works. Until the end of September, see you!

Still not progressing as much as I want on writing. I still get tempted by distractions and only get two or so pages down per day instead of the usual four or five. I looked up a few writing apps to see if they would help but not many appear compatible with Opera. I surmise I have to work harder with staying concentrated. I hope I can make posting chapters 19 and 20 at the end of next month, since editing chapters 21 and 22 might need a few more drafts. As always it’s hard to balance so many characters and find places to put in even little character moments. Also chapters 21 and 22 are now around 45 pages total. Kind of wild that the first draft was barely even 30 pages at first but it’s what happens when you try to edit and expand things.

Still haven’t socialized as much online. Did a bit more original posts and responses, but I have stayed with observing and merely reposting other people’s posts. That is good in some cases with issues other people know more about and have more standing to speak up on but it can cut in with talking with other people. A certain version of that I alluded to can be draining. As I said before, maybe once a day or every other day, I should talk to someone. That way, I can get used to talking with others and maybe roll with any mistakes I might make.

( Spoilers and talk of Detective Pikachu and Godzilla King of the Monsters 2019 )

Anyway, that’s all for now. I have a weird lump on my neck I have had checked out. Hopefully, it’s nothing. Until the end of July, see you!

Within a week, I’ll be done with the semester. It’ll be the last time I take Writing Portfolio, since I took the minimum four times required. I can do more but decided not to do it for next semester. With the remaining classes left, I decided to only take one, beginning with Nonfiction in the Fall. There’s a requirement to have at least one class out of your focus, which is Fiction for me, so I’ll deal with that. The only other classes were spending the entire semester writing the manuscript and sending it back to your advisor for feedback and rewrites. That sounds like a lot of work, so I would prefer not to have additional schoolwork while doing that. I’m not sure if I’m nearly done with my Personal Marketing Report but I’m very close. All I need to do is check out my sources for publishers, do some organizing of the sections and read through for spelling or grammar errors, and then I’d be finished

In other news, I have kept meaning to see Missing Link but other appointments kept getting in the way. Since the film is doing so badly, it left theaters Monday. I was interested in seeing Fast Color but checking Fandango revealed it wasn’t playing in any theaters in my state. By the time I read a post that prompted me to contact my local theater about it, the film was already on its way out from its very limited theatrical run. I was a bit late to act and my theater seemed to indicate it doesn’t do limited release indie films anyway. I should have called the out-of-town theater that runs indie films to see if they would play it. Hopefully, the film will show up on Netflix. I planned to see Avengers Endgame tomorrow but I realized I had a dentist appointment that day.

I already saw the dentist the week before and apparently I haven’t been flossing right. I should replace the floss every day so the old gunk doesn’t get pushed into new places and I need to really get down in the gums to get some of it out. I tried to use regular floss, having forgone them for floss picks due to weak hand strength, and I’m finding it challenging. I watched a video on how to do it, but I keep losing track of what teeth gaps to do next and I’m finding it hard pushing it up through the tighter gaps and making sure I take care both sides of the gaps. Each time, I gave up and used a floss pick, albeit doing it in front of a mirror. Maybe I need to practice more or see more videos? If this continues to be an issue, I should be more honest with them about some of my strength limitations, since I lost nerve with the person who did the teeth cleaning keeping saying I can do it.

With my fanfic writing, I’m finding a chapter of We Will Hold On Forever I’m working on is shorter than I anticipated it to be. There are a lot of fight scenes in it and you can’t extend them too long without making them boring. My focus is expanding on the mood and character bits. I suspect it would lead to ten additional pages, but I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s more than that. A lot of the chapters and stories tend to be longer than expected. It’s not a guarantee that the next set of chapters will be posted early but it does indicate some good progress.

That’s all for now. Right now, I’m recovering from doing something that was very anxiety-inducing a few days back. Until the end of May, see you!

The end of the second month of the year. I’m getting the hang of The Literary Market class. The work feels a wee bit more demanding but I’m able to surf it. A part of me couldn’t help but worry about doing things for the class like a query letter but it wasn’t as hard as I thought. The voice that says to put things off can appear but fortunately, I ignore it for this class, since it’s teaching aspects of the publishing industry. The only chance I might listen to that voice if going into publishing might make me end writing and posting fanfiction.

Speaking of fanfiction, still editing the opening arc chapters for We Will Hold On Forever. I don’t know if I’ll be able to post the ending arc 2 chapters by the end of March but we’ll see. I’m following Jordan Peele’s advice on writing to “follow the fun” and am just writing whatever scenes or ideas catch interest. At the moment, it’s “Tiny Moments, Big Impact.” It’s fun doing a Land Before Time AU and exploring how things can be different. I do love Ruby and Chomper but having two less characters to juggle around with the gang is a relief. I think I will continue writing this AU, since it’s still engaging for me.

We have yet another person staying with us. An uncle from my father’s side. Due to personal problems, he had been visiting us often at first, borrowing one of our cars to take care of business. Then at some point, he just up and moved in with us. He’s pretty easygoing and helps around the house more than a bit, so I don’t mind it that much but it is disconcerting to have the house be a least a bit more crowded. I’m introverted and like quiet, but the noise from our household can get annoying. Mom said it isn’t permanent but it’s likely a long term stay. At least he entertains my extrovertic nephew. It guess it’s part of life that you have to be in environments that aren’t toxic but you aren’t comfortable in.

I haven’t seen any movies this month. I was planning to see Lego Movie 2 but the previous two movies weren’t to my taste and I saw a Marie Kondo inspired post that advised dropping shows you aren’t interested in and don’t make you happy, so I skipped that movie. I plan to see How To Train Your Dragon 3 but the next available time to arrive on the five dollar day was next week. On the bright side, I heard the movie’s good, so I look forward to seeing it.

On a related matter, that Marie Kondo-inspired post made me decide to drop watching YuGiOh Vrains. There are some good things and season 2 started on a good note, but it was becoming a bit draining for me to watch. I was doing it out of habit. Others can enjoy it but I’m out. I’ll use that time to watch Star Wars Resistance instead, which I marathoned after seeing the mid-season trailer. It’s been getting interesting and, though the writing can be clunky, I’m enjoying it. I’m a bit sad Buddyfight Ace is apparently going to end, since I love the characters and the writing has much improved from previous seasons. Apparently, Yuga’s story will be continued in a manga but I’m unsure if I want to continue it that way and where would I read it if I wanted to. On the bright side, it gives me more time to watch other stuff.

That’s all for now. Until the end of March, see you! 

I finished my term on the ninth. Truthfully, classes ended on the Monday and Friday of that week but I finished revising a story for one class as much as I could, so I thought I might as well compile my portfolios for both classes and send them in. I checked my grades on Christmas Eve and I got an A for both classes. I kind of expected as much, so I’m not gripped by elation or relief. As long as I do well in class and anticipate I get good grades, I’m not the type to linger over them. 

For Christmas and other gift-giving holidays, I decided I’ll limit the amount of money I’d spend for gifts for myself to between thirty and forty dollars. I got the Land Before Time DVDs for movie 13 and episodes of the TV series, and will complete the remaining entries on my birthday. There is one TV episode that apparently never got a DVD release but I can always watch it online. I would have to hold off getting monster DVDs until maybe Easter or next Christmas/birthday. They are generally more expensive and that self-imposed money limit will mean I get fewer of them but I’ll see how that goes. Like on Thanksgiving, I did some socializing but not as much as last time and went back to watching things on my computer. There was an awkward social moment where I tried to be brave about something only to back out but I don’t think that was the source of my reclusivity. Ah well, I’m not as guilty about it. I did play Digimon Christmas music when I got up that morning as fitting background music when my delighted nephew opened his presents.

Posted the next pair of We Will Hold On Forever chapters. I know the past few chapters have been slower and not as exciting but this changes here. I don’t know if I could have made those slower chapters more interesting or did something else to accomplish what I needed but hopefully you will see the importance of those quiet moments in future chapters. The next two chapters will close out arc 2 but I’m working on the opening chapters for arc 3 these next months. I actually already wrote most of it a year or two earlier but in light of developments that usually come with writing a story, there need to be major rewrites, so expect a February or March posting time. This intensive writing can get exhausting, so I’m taking breaks on weekends whenever I’m not falling behind in the routine. It won’t last when semester starts but I’ll see the benefits during summer break.

( Talk and spoilers for Ralph Breaks The Internet )

That is all for now. I got back from shopping with my mom and feeling tired from having to get up early to do so. On this New Years’ Eve, I hope to become a better and braver person in the next year. I don’t know how that might happen. I hope this won’t become one of those resolutions that I will look back on and cringe at. Well, we’ll see. Until the end of the first month of 2019, see you!

It’s fall. It’s getting pretty cold and though some might lament that, I welcome it, since I can sleep more easily in the cold and get to have the pressure of additional blankets. Of course, that meant I often slept a bit later than I want and I’m still struggling with having enough sleep and a consistent sleep schedule. Not helping is also the cold, since it’s become too cold most days to go for a walk and that leaves me thrumming with energy that effects my sleep. I told my parents and my Dad plans to fix the treadmill we had gathering dust for the past couple years. He planned to fix it the last two weekends, but he was busy removing two of our three air conditioners and last week he got sick. In the meantime, I try to make up for this by joining my mom in shopping and vacuuming every other weekend. When it’s even close to sixty degrees, I go out in many layers. I hope the treadmill thing gets taken care of soon.

Having a more advanced phone is useful. On the long drives to and from the dentist, I had Mom listen to a news segments where Native American activists were interviewed about their perspective on the Elizabeth Warren DNA test issue and listening to an audio drama. I was worried a bit Mom would find them, especially the drama, distracting but she was able to get around fine. More importantly, she liked what I had to offer with these. I plan to have her listen to a few other audio dramas the next time we drive and there’s a podcast I’m eying for her to listen too.

Still editing the next We Will Hold On Forever chapters. At the moment, it’s around 65 pages total, but I have a vague goal of cutting it to at least 50. I’ll probably take it to 60 though with my luck. It is a challenge to juggle so many characters at once while still keeping an even pace and even somewhat manageable page count. Exile’s Lone Company is being worked on and off but there are a lot of scenes being added that will definitely have to be reworked on a next draft. With my classes, it has to be accepted only a few one-shots will be posted a year, if I’m lucky. There is only so much time in a day and I have to prioritize it in some ways, especially when I’m writing original fiction for class that should hopefully lead me to getting published one day. I don’t know how that’ll effect my fanfiction writing but I’ll put that aside for now. I’ll just have to see if Exile’s Lone Company can be posted at some time next year.

( Cut for spoiler talk for Smallfoot and The Hate U Give, and babble about Barney the Dinosaur. Yes, really. )

That is all for now. Will be going to the dentist Friday to get some fillings in. Until the end of November, see you!